Put Yourself Out There Anyway...

If putting yourself out there was easy, we'd do it all the time. My career has been based on developing and mentoring others to achieve their dreams and it's always an amazing feeling when those dreams become a reality. The hard part is the obstacles that prevent those dreams from becoming a reality, and the biggest obstacle I see, is fear. Those fears show themselves in the form of blame and excuses and often cause us to settle because let's face it, what we're really avoiding is pain and discomfort. What we really have is fear of rejection. In fact, it's always been my belief that 15% of the people somehow can bypass the fear of rejection and 15% of the people may always play it safe. It's the 70% of us that sway in one direction or the other at any point in our lives.

Did you know that Ann Frank's The Diary of a Young Girl got rejected 15 times before being published? Stephen King's Carrie , 30 times and Margaret Mitchell's Gone With the Wind was rejected 38 times! What they all have in common is they put themselves out there anyway. They stuck to their purpose and they realized that not everyone would believe in their work the way they did, but someone would, and eventually someone did.

When I was twelve I lived in the bay area of California. I went to school with many kids that lived in much larger homes and wore much more expensive clothes than I did. Their parents drove Mercedes and they all went on vacations that I would never take. I remember one day I was talking to two of the girls in my class, two of my friends and one of them whispered in the other's ear, "look at her shoes". They of course had no idea that I had heard them as they laughed to each other and I was deeply hurt. So much so that it stings, even today. I could have retreated, I could have lashed out, but I kept going on. I showed up at parties in big houses and I held my head high.

When I moved back to the east coast I went to a high school that was very divided by the haves and the have nots. I won't tell you that the haves were my best of friends, but I was able to mingle in and out of many circles because I learned that what we have to offer in this life doesn't come from what we own, it comes from what we share of ourselves and in order to do that we must put ourselves out there anyway.

I never went to college and the first time I accepted a position in a leadership role someone told me that I could never do it because I didn't have any experience. What did I know? Every time someone thanks me or tells me that their life has changed for the good and I was part of it, I am thankful that I didn't listen. Pythagoras in  6th Century BC said the world was round, which was not a popular belief, Walt Disney was told he had no imagination and Lucille Ball was told by her drama instructor that she should chose another profession. They put themselves out there anyway.

I'm not telling you that I don't feel hurt when people reject me or my ideas, but I've realized that it's okay and I rebound much quicker these days with the understanding that not everyone, even those closest to me will like what I have to say, or share my opinions, think that I'm right, or want to do what I want to do, but isn't that what makes this world an amazing place, the differences? I am not defined by others opinions, I'm defined by my ability to stay on my purpose with the knowing that someone out there will benefit from what I have to offer in life. We will all get hurt, uncomfortable and have our hearts broken, but we were all meant to shine, be loved and make a difference in the world and you will, if you're brave enough to put yourself out there anyway.